Looking great at twenty is as easy as putting a hot knife through butter.  Peaches and cream complexion , smooth skin and body parts still at the point of origin are just a few of the glories of being young.  Time, stress, and elasticity have a great knack of trying to prove the the theory of gravity and once you approach the milestone of over forty…rolling out of bed and throwing something on is no longer an option.

Some may think that the greatest invention for women was Botox while others may argue that it was surely Retinal A.  I say it was neither!  The greatest discovery for women was Spanx.  Never has elastic had such a profound impact on a group of people.  If you are a man reading this blog you might be wondering what in the world “Spanx” are.  If you are a woman you might be annoyed that I am letting our little secret out of the bag but I just feel that one of our sisters might be still living under a rock and may need this little bit of advice.  I started with Spanx about nine years ago when my best friend told me of her new find.  I went to the mall the next day and ran home to try out the cure to womanhood.  Luckily, no one was home.  If they had been, they certainly would have called 911 as I was twisting and turning across my bed trying to shove parts of my body part in the undergarment much like a butcher would stuff a sausage casing.  My legs and back stretched in positions that only someone who was auditioning for Circus Soliel  would have dared.  Somehow they were finally on and I remember making the firm decision that any idea of going to the bathroom was completely out of the question.  But every bump, bulge, and lump was instantly gone and while I was not sure where they went I was certain that if the suit I was stuffed into was to ever let go I would level a room- a human weapon of mass destruction.

High heels are another phenomenon.  It always amazes me when I see  young girls schlubbing along in their flip flops.  Wake up!!  This is the time of your life when heels are your friend.  You are willing to stuff your feet into any shoe deemed as an affordable high heel just because they are cute considering nothing about comfort.  When you reach the milestone of forty and over the choices are much more calculated.  Although as self serving as this might seem, there really is nothing more elegant than a mature woman gracefully walking around in a gorgeous pair of stilettos.  Wearing heels when you are young is your calling card to elegance, grace and style for the future so don’t wait to walk in them when you get older.

There is also the process of going to sleep at night.  When you are twenty going to sleep requires nothing more than laying your head on a pillow.  When you are forty plus jars and tubes filled with promises fall out of the medicine cabinet.  My body is so greased up a seat belt is often necessary just to stay in bed. I bet there are not many twenty year olds that fear their pillow cases but forty year olds can relate when I say that a crease  left on their face from merely sleeping can be an all day event of keeping your hand on your face. Continue reading →